Swipe Left, Swipe Right… Delete
What do Tinder, Bumble, and Match have in common? I will kill the suspense. These are all dating apps. Also, these are dating apps that I have used off and on for a period of about 24 months. What leads me to use these apps? To be honest because certain friends and family suggested I give them a try since dating in NYC is an experience that is rather dismal. Each of these apps had their pros and cons. When I first used all of these apps it seemed to be more of a form of entertainment than actually finding a date. The first two apps are based on looking for someone you are visually attracted to. Match the later app seemed to me as a more personality and interest-driven factor to its use. After using these apps off and on, I deleted them around the end of 2018. I will share some insights into why I deleted them and why I will probably not waste my time and use them again:
Fuckboy central. Dating mobile applications just make certain men who are fuckboys have easier access to partake in their fuckery. I have no time for that. What is pretty interesting is that I have met men in real life outside of a dating app and I match with them on the app and they still ghost me. Disappearing acts are not cool. Spare me the nonsense.
Disappointments are plentiful. Let’s face it certain individuals pictures are deceptive. People lie about how they look like all the time. Catfishing is real. Also, people use photos from 5 years ago or only take selfies. If a profile has no full body pics be prepared to be disappointed.
Pen pals should stay in the ’90s. So you match with someone you find attractive than what. The never ending texts commence. You will be lucky if you have a facetime or a phone call. If we are texting for a month sorry I’m not wasting my time. Save your keystrokes for someone who has the time and resources to be stuck to their phone. Pen pals are so 1997.
Backpage is down. There was an infamous site that got pulled down last year or the year before. It was called Backpage. It was for soliciting sex among other things. It seems apparent that some of its former users have infiltrated dating apps. They only want to do what grown folks do with no strings attached. I was just looking for a date not to be solicited for intercourse. I have matched with people who just wanted to smash. Responsible adults don’t need an app for that with all of these STD’s going around.
Digital detox needed. I have to admit I am an analog person living in a digital world. I love to do things that don’t involve my phone or laptop. Like going out to brunch and not doing an Instagram story of the whole experience, going to concerts, reading, and guess what talking to people without texting them. If I use a dating app to look for a date will I actually find a decent one? Also, I love to do things like it was 2002. No smartphone needed.
What have I learned from this experience? I was born at the wrong time. All jokes aside, I have learned you have to do things differently to get results. So I will live with an analog mindset. I am going to experience life in a non-digital way. So there you have it swipe left, swipe right and then delete that annoying app. What are your experiences with dating apps? Are you ready to date the old fashioned way? Comment below. I would love to hear your stories.